K is for Kinky

(I know, I know, I still have an H, two Is and Js, and are we on L last week? to do, but hey, something is better than nothing.)

Yesterday, my lion and I had a brief conversation about a flogger.

A bit of it went something like:

"So it's yours."

"No.  It belongs to Set."

He looked quite bemused.  "... oh."

"There are things that I am not permitted because of my relationship with that god.  That's why it lives on the shrine."

"I would be interested if you could tell me about that sometime."

"I am not permitted to fear pain."

And we talked a bit from there - that the item was primarily a reminder touchstone, and that as an item whose sole purpose is to inflict pain goes (though really, it's not terribly hardcore on that front at all, a middling thud with an edge of sting; it is, however, beautiful), it serves as a touchstone of the restrictions I have as part of my service to Neb.y.

The intersections of sexuality - especially kinky sexuality - and spirituality can be very fraught conversations in pagan community.  People who often have a definition of "worship" that includes being beaten-down, abasing the self, or requires them to think of themselves as shitty human beings often, unsurprisingly, have conceptual issues around service and ownership relationships with deities.  And that's without getting into the whole OMGPAIN factor, where there are occasionally overblown or half-manufactured rants about torture and other such nonsense, or people arguing that pain play is intrinsically in opposition to the body, or any of a bunch of other bullshit.  (I wonder sometimes if they're in ignorance or denial of the practices of flagellation and other forms of pain interaction as worldwide mystical practices - including among certain Christian saints.)  Sometimes it's possible to have a sensical conversation about it; sometimes it's not.  It's always touchy.

"... actually, I was wrong.  I am permitted to fear pain.  I am not permitted to allow fear of pain to prevent me from action."

"That is a subtle - but significant - distinction."

"Yeah.  I don't think He'd like it if I didn't fear pain."

"Fear of pain is useful!"

"Also, my god is a sadist."